Posterous theme by Cory Watilo

b.s.

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Brussels sprouts were my nemesis as a kid. They were the leading cause of crying and tantrums at the dinner table from 1978-1983. Their very existence was a reminder that no, I couldn't push through any steamed vegetable that my mom dealt me, even if I had a large enough glass of milk with which to wash it down.

It all changed a year ago over dinner with an old friend. She asked if I wanted to split an order of Brussels sprouts with her. I tried to hide my Yuck Face, but it was no use. It was 1983 again, and I was flashing back to being trapped at the dinner table until I finished my vegetables.

I decided to be a grown up and give them a try. They were amazing. These were not the Brussels sprouts from my childhood, the nasty little cabbages that were steamed to within an inch of their lives. These were sautéed in butter, and had pancetta and cranberries to complete them. I was in love.

I stumbled upon some beautiful little guys at the farmers' market on Saturday, and decided to try my hand at recreating this recipe tonight, with (a lot of) help from Paula Deen.

It's not 1983 anymore. I guess its time to get rid of those Duran Duran CDs, too.

emancipation

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I woke up crazy early this morning with energy I couldn't explain.  I knew I wasn't going to be able to go back to sleep, because I started thinking about the things I needed to get done at work today.  I did my usual morning social media roundup, checking my Facebook, Twitter, and RSS feeds to see what my friends were up to at this ungodly hour.  

It was then that I decided today was the day:  I am taking my Twitter account off of lockdown and killing the privacy setting.

I realize that this isn't earth shattering news, but it's a big deal for me.  I've had it locked down to keep my private life private from a few people for quite some time.  I thought it was respectful for me to keep my life to myself for a while.  I went through a breakup and just wanted to work on myself and live my life, and I didn't want any random posts to start any problems.  I didn't date for close to a year while I worked on myself.  I realized that I had been in one relationship after another for nine years, and that I needed to find out who I was again. 

The results have been awesome.   I turned 40 and didn't have a nervous breakdown like I did at 30.  I've lost 16 pounds since last summer.  I've had some amazing travel experiences and learned a lot about myself.  My friends are my family.  I have a job that I love.  My cat loves me unconditionally.  My life is pretty incredible.  If we know each other, you're probably tired of hearing about it by now, but I can't help it.  

I can't keep it all in.  I don't want to.

I was embarrassed about something I did in public last week, when the person I was with looked me in the eye solidly and said, "no one cares what you're doing."  I always feel like someone is watching, and sometimes they are (especially when it comes to social media).  Sometimes they are watching obsessively.  Sometimes they aren't.  None of that should matter.  

I can't keep it all in.  I don't want to.

We need to shout out when things are good in our lives.  Other people need to hear it.  There is so much bad news in the world all of the time.  Why is it okay for us to talk about that but not the good stuff?  Let's start talking about the good stuff in our lives.  It's not bragging, or gloating, or anything negative like that.  We have to flip that mindset.

Share your goodness in the comments, if you're so inclined.  

connection

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This has been an awesome day, and I wasn't even aware of its awesomeness until I got home and it hit me all at once.

I had the chance to talk to some people I hadn't heard from in a while, tackled an important issue before it became a real problem, mingled with my coworkers over lunch, made a new friend in real life who I'd previously only known online, and touched base with my bff about the new job she just landed.

The common theme was connection. I felt it in all of these situations today, each of them different in their own ways, but all equally important to my inner happiness and well being.

Maybe I need to start every morning taking pictures like this one from my garden to remind me to focus on the things that matter.

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In Common

courtesy of Lifehacker: 

http://lifehacker.com/5751875/five-traits-low+stress-happy-work-cultures-have...


Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In CommonAround the world you'll find scientifically identified pockets of happy people ranging in size from neighborhoods to entire countries. Researcher Dan Buettner spent years studying them to find out what makes them so special, and how others can emulate their success in the happiness department.

Photo by Nana B Agyei.

This week we're taking a look at the work of researcher and author Dan Buettner. Buettner has spent years studying what makes people happy around the world and what governments, communities, and individuals can do to grab a piece of this well being. Today we're going to highlight some of Buettner's tips—from his book Thrive: Finding Happiness the Blue Zones Way—on how to apply the lessons from the "blue zones"—the areas of concentrated happiness and well being he's studied like Denmark and Singapore—and apply those to your day-to-day work life—no immigration necessary.

One thing to keep in mind while entertaining how to incorporate the following tips into your life is that each one of them has a micro and macro scale option. You can decrease the time you spend commuting, for example, by asking to work from home a few days a week, changing the time of day you commute, moving closer to work, changing jobs, or quitting and starting a job that you can work at from home. How dramatic of a change you make is constrained only by how thoroughly you desire and are able to make the change.

Limit Your Workweek

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In Common
American culture is undeniably one of Puritan work ethic and measurement of worth in financial earning. Buettner points out that the time and energy you spend working, past a certain point, has limited rewards and often takes away from the things that would make you happier in life-spending time with your family, enjoying a hobby, playing a sport, learning a new skill. Once you make a certain amount of money you're just making more money and not acquiring more happiness; a study we highlighted last fall supports the idea of a happiness wall in financial earnings. Photo by Greg Mote.

Whether you limit your workweek by making small and subtle changes such as leaving your work laptop at work on the weekends or making drastic changes such as downsizing your house so you can afford to work fewer hours at a lower stress job, the fewer hours you work and the more hours you have available for the rest of life the happier you'll be.

Avoid Long Commutes

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In CommonAmong surveyed workers, commuting was their least favorite daily activity. When quantifying just how unhappy commuting made them, Buettner discovered that they'd need a nearly 40% increase in wages to be as happy as somebody who was able to walk to the very same job. Make your commute more bearable and potentially quicker by checking out our tips and tools for commuters or convincing your boss that you should telecommute. Photo by Rebecca Wilson.

Don't Skip Vacation

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In Common
The average American worker doesn't even take the meager two weeks that is considered basic vacation time in most workplaces. Buettner suggestions breaking up your year with multiple vacations as research indicates that we derive almost as much pleasure from planning the vacation as we do from taking it. Four, week-long vacations over the course of the year provide 4 times as many pleasure-inducing planning periods as a single lengthy one would. It should strike no one as surprising that the majority of the "blue zones" he studies are in cultures that place an emphasis on the importance of and sanctity of regular vacationing. Photo by Ahmed Amir.

Enjoy Happy Hour

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In CommonThe happiest people inside and out of the "blue zones" were the social ones. After-hours socializing helps build relationships with your coworkers, helps you unwind, and fosters community inside and outside of the workplace, which is one of the planks of happy "blue zone" life. Photo by Andy Coan.

If your workplace doesn't have a social element to it, seek out coworkers and start a tradition of socializing after work or on the weekends. You might not love everyone you work with, but having a social connection to them outside of office drudgery makes work more enjoyable and fosters good will. If you can't stand the thought of socializing with your current crop of coworkers consider finding somewhere else to work and, at minimum, making sure to foster a social life with non-work friends. The more hours a day you socialize the happier you'll be and every addition of a good and trustworthy friend brings as much happiness as a raise.

Find the Right Boss

Five Traits Low-Stress, Happy Work Cultures Have In CommonAlthough it should go without saying, many people over look the importance of a good boss (or are so discouraged from years of having terrible ones that they just give up and accept poor management). Having a good boss is the single best indicator that you'll enjoy your work. Having a crappy boss is a surefire way to be miserable. Photo by The Mighty Time Inconnu.

If you've got the boss from hell it's time to start searching for a new job (or a transfer to a different department). Good bosses provide regular feedback, provide clear requirements and expectations, and offer recognition for your work. This is the kind of advice that many people shake their heads at and say "I can't just go find another job." but the alternative is passively waiting out your bad boss and hoping that he'll be replaced by somebody better. That's no way to find happiness in the workplace.


The best of of Buettner's book isn't all the tips on ways you can incorporate "blue zone" living into your life, truth be told. The tips are great and we're not down playing them, but the real value in the book is the way it functions as an expedition around the world. By seeing how people live in Denmark, Mexico, Singapore, and other countries where levels of happiness and contentment are radically higher than in the US you being to get a sense that the way you're living, the endless hours you work, and the vacations you decline are abnormal and that there is more out there than 60 hour weeks and weekends spent with the company laptop.
To read more, grab a copy of Buettner's book Thrive: Finding Happiness the Blue Zones Way or visit his web site here.


perspective

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I came to the most ridiculous realization while having some peaceful time on a beach in Texas:

I'm not good at taking vacation.

This probably isn't a big shock for those of you who know me. However, admitting that to myself was a little tough to swallow.

I was so excited about my upcoming trip to Europe, but when people asked me about it, the first thing that came out of my mouth was that sure, I was excited, BUT I had so many projects to knock out at work before I left.

No one gives a crap about that. They wanted to be excited WITH me and FOR me, and I gave them the Debbie Downer answer.

It was time to change my perspective. Europe was waiting, and she demanded it.

fast forward*

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Do you ever catch yourself, while doing something you are really enjoying, thinking ahead to the next thing? It could be work the next day, a project that needs to be done around the house, or what you need to pick up at the store later.

Why? Why do we allow ourselves to sacrifice our happiness, even while we are in The Moment, to dwell on mundane things that don't matter as much?

Is it just me? Why is it so difficult to 'be' where you are? Isn't that why we work so hard in the first place, so that we can spend a little time doing the things that we really love? Why are we wishing the good times away when we can enjoy THIS moment?

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*This was written in its entirety back in October. I was sitting on the porch of a beach house in Texas (on stilts!) looking out at the waves, and talking to my good friend's wife who I had just met moments earlier. Here we were, drinking a glass of wine on a Friday night, feeling that warm wind hit our face, listening to the waves crash...we were in That Moment...and we were talking about how much going to work on Monday was going to suck.

Seriously? I really needed to get some perspective on things that actually matter. And that started in Texas.

weekend baking, part 2

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Most of you know that I'm not actually the baking type. However, after yesterday's 'egg whites in a carton are not the same as real eggs' fiasco, I had to give it another shot.

I jumped out of bed and headed to the store. To buy eggs. Before 10am. See how possessed I was with making these damned things?

With eggs in hand, I hit the kitchen to start endurance baking. Well, that's what it felt like after prepping and baking three rounds of macaroons. This is not the world I live in, kids.

The pic above shows how the first batch came out before I tried beating the egg whites until they were stiff (man, that sounds dirty). These were my favorite batch, and they photographed well. Isn't that all that counts? Oh, and they tasted really good, too.

I won't repost the recipe until I perfect it...which means probably never. We are having the supreme budget smackdown this week with our execs from our Euro HQ, which is probably why I got fixated on baking instead of spreadsheets for once.

Avoidance is my specialty, after all.